My Grandma's Walker

Like an old snow covered mountain, meditating in deep silence with utmost peace and calmness, seasons come and go enriching the wilderness and bewitching it more. I was there after months seeing her getting more wrinkled and beautiful, her smile was serene and hands shaking while imparting blessings. She looked like old Buddha whose presence was enough to bring a gentle and pleasant breeze running over the body. Her thoughts were strong and knees weak, she would get up and bring something to welcome the children she loved. Her face reflected the pain every step would cause.

This time her walker was a bit different, some changes were done to hold a tray onto it, as both hands were busy in holding the walker. Whatever the pain could be, the love she holds would give her the courage to smile and do more. She was observing my silence which was tensed and eyes fixed to her steps. She is a mother of two sons and still she holds iron to support her, her cries were answered only when they get unbearable. She lost the strongest man of her life year ago and her journey became more annoying and heart melting. Life is just a survival at this age and can be torcherous too, this is like lifeless childhood when you intentionally forget everything to get rid of pain and agony that ignorance causes, you are cared by none, spirits diminish and thoughts get entangled.

She could hear the conversation I was holding to myself. Sitting next to me and holding my hand she said, this walker is a bigger support than anything else could be. It is always nearby and never says no to hold me and it gives me more freedom than I expected from my blood. It takes me far away from the negativity which was bearing when it was not here, sometimes material can support you better. The pain I bear is an experience that I will take away with me and no freedom and change can come without pain, so I enjoy that too. Life is too short when you try to suppress it but way too long thrill when you free yourself. Old age is an indication of life getting free from limits and boundaries. Yes I cry when I can’t bear more but it’s a part of life and important too and when it goes beyond, I get into the old memories of being a child running inside the house and it helps me relieve. Don’t let life put bad impressions on the memory, be clear and happy.

Her ageless experience could make anyone listen to her like a child observing her mother and the conviction she holds is timeless. May be old age makes one perfect in being self dependent, may be material and self are more reliable, her reasoning brought back the smile on my face.