I was the most loved one in the family, my parents went to every saint and seer in Lahore they heard from others and asked for blessings to get a child. It was after the wait of eight long years they heard the cry of a baby in the house, before me all were born dead. I brought good luck and fortune in the house and after me, the family was blessed with four more healthy kids.
I was the pride and honour of the family. There were very few girls in the town who went to the school and I was the one getting the best education. The illiteracy of my parents didn’t stop them from getting their children educated. My father was a gold merchant and one of the richest and respected in the city. I was always surrounded by books which helped me create a world of what I wanted. By the age of seven I had studied what people study in their twenties. The wisdom provided by the books is invaluable and most of the decisions I have taken is from the learning from books.
People in my family had sensed the bad omens and we left the country before the bloodshed started in 1947. There was enough money to start a new business and the financial acumen of my learned father helped him establish a well and growing business in India. I continued my studies and experiments with the life. I was eight when we escaped the war and at fourteen I was asked to marry. The illness of the father and the kind approach of Amma forced me to say yes. I never believed in fate before marriage but the life had to show me what power it holds over humans.
I didn’t know cooking and never thought of even trying it. My parents never asked me to clean the house even. I thought life would be same like it was before marriage, my decisions, my books, wisdom, learning but within few years the great business of my husband crashed and we were bankrupt. The big house was taken away by the money lenders and we moved to a small hermitage. The giant family living in a small space and quarreling every night over petty issues.
There were no nuts in the breakfast now, there was no meals for some days. My husband was taken aback facing the fall and all his efforts to restructure were succumbed. By some means we gathered money which helped in feeding ourselves. I decided to pursue nursing course to have a better future but I couldn’t bear the cutting and killing of animals and that one wrong decision resulted into a big failure. I started working as a maid, washing utensils and cleaning house. Every penny I earned was filled with my patience to bear the harsh and cuss words.
There is fate son, there are things out of our control, I am 76 now and I am still working for the betterment of the family. My siblings are rich and happy and I was the one most knowledgeable in the house. I have two sons but if I stop earning the family will fall. I faced domestic violence and still have the marks on the body.
Life never stops, we cannot escape, one can simply smile at every problem to make it powerless. Don’t let your wrong decisions power your fate. Correct soon and don’t wait but never say you have complete control over life. At least I cannot say this, my smile is a veil to the wounds in my heart.
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